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Changing Hearts and Minds

One of our aims is to inform the public about the level of sexual abuse. Until the public are made aware of the huge number of children that have been abused, and are still being abused, the systems that we now have in place will continue to cover up the truth.

  • We have people sitting on a jury in court that find it hard to believe the truth of a child’s abuse because they do not understand the effects and damage done to a child by these acts.
  • We have a system in place that does more to protect the people that are guilty of causing the abuse than supports a child that reports the abuse.

We need the general public to use their voice to let the people responsible for the present system know that it has to change.  Children should know that they can rely on the adults they have contact with to give them the support they need.

We should have zero tolerance when it involves a child being raped. 

It is shocking how our children being raped is tolerated so much that children do not have the confidence to know there is real help and support for them if they find themselves in that position.

The people that sexually abuse children know they are safe in what they are doing and can keep their victims silent by the threats they use to put fear in them. The “professionals” do not seem to know or understand what happens when a child is brainwashed by an abuser.

Why should adults be allowed to get away with raping children with no fear of what will happen to them? Adults and parents seem to have human rights, but the children have none.

There are many adults in this country that have had to suffer in silence as children.  We need to remove the stigma from them and let them know that it is the shame of us all for not wanting to know the truth.

If we can start to talk about this openly, then children will know it is all right to tell the adults in their lives that do not know.  Even as you read this you could know a child that is being abused by someone you trust – it could be a brother, husband, friend, father, grandfather, sister, aunt, mother.  Children do not want to cause trouble, and the people responsible for abusing children know what to do and say to keep them silent.

On the surface, some of these children appear happy or “normal”. It is a mask they wear to cover up what is happening to them.

Their “act” is seen as proof that all is OK – they are not acting weird and they even appear to like their abuser. These children are often very frightened of the repercussions of exposure as told to them by their abuser, or they think it is normal and just fight or suppress the internal feelings of shame they feel inside.

We need to hear what people that have had to endure living with abuse say about what they needed to enable them to speak out to get the abuse to stop.

Case Study

We have one young girl that told us that her mother held her down whilst she was raped, and although she was taken into care, nothing was done to help her.  The mother continued having her raped weekly by a gang of men until she was nineteen and a half. In all the years she kept telling “professionals” that her mother was still having her raped, none of the them did anything to provide her with a place of safety away from her mother. Although she said she wanted to talk but there would be consequences, she was not given the reassurance she needed.  She needed to know that she would be protected if she told them the truth about what was happening to her.

Although Social Services and the agency she was placed with kept some records of her telling them she was still being raped, nothing was done to find out why she kept saying it if it was not true. The only person that treated her with any care was a teacher that she told – her teacher really wanted to help her and was willing to spend time with her so that she would reach a place that she could talk. Social Services put this teacher in her place by telling her that she was being unprofessional.

It is well documented that the mother had strong control over her and that she could not do anything without her mother’s consent. Some of the things that the ”professional” wrote in the girl’s file without taking any action is quite unbelievable. This girl is so damaged that she does not know how to feel or think, as she has always just done what she was told by her mother.  Her mother had always told her that there was no point in telling anyone as they would not believe her.  The fact that Social Services allowed her mother to break contact agreements and the rape continued worked in the mother’s favour, as it proved to the girl that she “belong to her mother and she could do whatever she wanted to her”.

The “professionals” in her life that were supposed to be “experts” behaved as if they did not have the knowledge to know the effect on a child that has been raped since being a toddler. To listen to her account of some of the things that were done to her as a seven year old child is like listening to a horror story.  Some of these things were documented when she was fourteen years old but just dismissed. The mother was able to break all the rules and do whatever she wanted and nothing was done about it. Everything worked in her favour because she was a social worker and a bully. This woman also sexually abused her daughter herself and in having her raped she would tell her that “this is how I show my love for you”.